You Are Brilliant, Not Broken
I got a grand piano for graduating from Chiropractic school. Ya, Craig sure knows how to throw a surprise!! And this was for a good reason: me graduating 🙂 I had chronic patterns of start/stop in my life and this was the first time I followed through on something that I said I wanted. I can’t imagine how relieved he was (insert multiple eye rolls here…) I withdrew from school 2 times and took a trimester off, racking up 80k in student loan debt, not even a third of the way through. OMG, now looking back, I didn’t get it. But my “excuses” were valid:
- 99.99% Bedrest at 20 weeks – withdrawn within 4 weeks of school starting. I was 21 and trying to be an adult.
- My best friend, Ali (also a new momma), quit after a year of school and I was lost, sad and flat.
- Shortly after, I got strep and mono AGAIN – and withdrew to have a tonsillectomy, thinking that was the golden ticket.
See, those were darn good excuses! Yet still not good enough to throw in the towel, I went back and proved to myself that I could do it. I proved that I was strong, resilient and extremely focused. I proved that with support, he and I could each follow our dreams instead of allowing our failures to anchor us. We moved there for my dream and I wasn’t going to fail on this one.
I didn’t feel sorry for myself anymore. That next trimester of school, I found my people and my reason and trusted fully that I was on the right path. It’s one of only times in my first 21 years that I was EXCITED and PROUD of myself because of what I overcame. I went to seminars instead of class. I studied at Barnes and Noble instead of the library. I went home to Craig and Callyn instead of house parties. And it was the life I wanted.
Now pregnant again with Gavin, halfway through school, my family was nervous. Is she going to derail and now eat 180k in student loans without a degree? Heck no. Because I changed, we changed together. For the first time in my life, I didn’t need to be “motivated” because I had a reason, a spark and a path to achieve. We had Gavin and I was back in school with him 5 days later. It was easy.
The power of your mind will change your life.
Having a supportive partnership will change your life.
Being persistent to find your reason will change your life.
Having the courage to follow that spark will change your life.
Never give up on you. The spark will be there even in the dark. All you need is a match.
You are brilliant, not broken.