The “Curse” of the Strong Woman

Someone close to me said to me the other day, “I don’t think about giving you a compliment because you always look like you have your shit together.”

Such an interesting perspective. It got me thinking…

Why do we tend to compliment people when we feel they need it, when they look weak, insecure, sad? But when we see a strong, confident woman, we don’t think they need the compliment. Or maybe our own insecurity gets in the way and we are intimidated by them. Nonetheless, we may love something about them or just notice something on a stranger and decide not to go out of our comfort zone or assume to think they don’t need it. They do.

We strong women are HUMAN. And all humans have a deep need to be loved and accepted. We need acknowledgement, we want to be noticed. We want to be reminded that we are on the right track (even if we aren’t sometimes) and that even if we fall on our face, it’s all going to be ok. We will still be loved. We want to be assured to keep dreaming, to keep doing what makes us happy. We want to be honored, even when we have a terrible day. We want our spouse, our kids to be proud of us unconditionally. Even when we suck and don’t know our head from our ass.

Give love, notice things, share your heart. Get your head out of the way and be your best by making others.

Remember that it’s not about you, but about your mom, sister, friend, daughter, neighbor or someone you don’t know.  It’s how you make that woman feel by sharing your heart – whether they look like they need encouragement or not. Make eye contact, smile, give love and share when you are guided. Make her day. It may just be the thing she needs to turn her day, week or month around.

Or maybe even her life.

You’re kicking ass, lady!

Dr. T

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