Left out?

Do you make decisions out of FOMO?

FOMO = Fear.Of.Missing.Out

I was the QUEEN of this from 14-35 years old. Although mostly healed, every now and then I have a hard time going to the bathroom during a social event in case I miss something.

Now I can see that caused so much undue pressure. And fear. And distrust. And following those feelings, I made decisions to fit in instead of stand out…for 20 years. I chose the path of least resistance instead of courage and vulnerability.

So where do you experience FOMO in your life? In an old social group that you’ve grown out of but still want to be ‘in the know’? With your gossip-y work acquaintances because you’re afraid if you’re not with them, they will talk about you? You attend events out of necessity, so you don’t feel guilt and resentment after?

Or maybe it’s the other way around – you feel guilty about things you have said ‘NO’ to but are happy you said no to them. You told your child’s teacher that you’re not available to volunteer in her classroom; you’re not available to chaperone a church group, coach your player’s travel team or attend the neighborhood social. You made the decision out of lack of resources – not enough time, energy or focus – so you scratched some things. Maybe they are important, maybe not. But the decision needs to be made from the heart, not from guilt or resentment.

FOMO is just an ego-ridden feeling that will keep you on the merry-go-round of insecurity, questioning and comparing.

Examine your life and your actions… and always keep this thought handy:
Maybe the person you’re really avoiding is YOU.

 Dr. T

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